


All For Him

by morethnwords



Series: As Long As I Have You...And You [1]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, First Kiss, Jace is confused and then not confused and then very confused, M/M, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Other, Polyamory, alec freaking out
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-18
Updated: 2018-05-18
Packaged: 2019-05-07 12:45:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14671386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/morethnwords/pseuds/morethnwords
Summary: When Alec and Magnus propose a new and nontraditional relationship to Jace, he's left confused and unsure of how to proceed. When he finally decides he can't continue avoiding Alec, they try to have a chat which leaves them breathless and at the beginning of a new chapter in their life.





	All For Him

           All was quiet in the Institute, the night patrol shift was out and the staff was stripped to essential personnel only while the rest of the shadowhunters returned to their quarters to retire for the evening.  **Jace** however was just slipping back into the building, hoping to move about inconspicuously as he made his way towards the living quarters. He’d been doing this more and more lately, making himself scarce - it had been intentional. And he knew Alec was grateful for it. They had enough issues to deal with without having to face the conversation they’d forced out the week before. All of it was  _ wrong _ . And Jace wasn’t usually one to follow rules, or stay within the lines of things, but this crossed over they put everything they had at jeopardy. Their friendship, their brotherhood, their  _ parabatai _ bond. When Magnus and Alec had sat Jace down with a proposition that was altogether too tempting he had been the one to talk some sense into them. This was  _ crazy _ . And  **by the angel** , Jace had to keep Alec from this mistake. 

           Then again, it wasn’t as if he hadn’t thought about it, constantly replaying Magnus’ words in his head, over and over again until they were committed to memory, “ _ Why deny Alec everything he wants, when it would be so easy for us to give it to him? _ ” Jace winced, the words playing back once again as he neared Alec’s room, stopping in the corridor and looking to the closed door, wondering if Alec was inside or if he’d gone back to Magnus’ loft for the evening. It would be so easy. And while Jace hadn’t ever thought about Alec in such a way, lately it was all he could think about. The ways they loved each other. What he wouldn’t do to  _ give Alec everything he wants _ . Magnus was right about that. It would be  **so easy** . And yet, if they ever got caught… Jace sighed, shaking the thoughts from his mind as he stepped towards Alec’s room, knocking on the door with a determination to put a stop to this nonsense once and for all.

***

**Alec** was still awake, pacing in his room his phone to his ear as he listened to the calming tones of Magnus’ voice, trying to talk him off the ledge he’d worked himself into. Four days. Four days since the last time Jace had spoken to him. He’d ruined  _ everything _ . And he wasn’t sure that there was a way to fix it. “Why’d I let…Magnus, I can’t lose him!” He argued in a voice panicked and frowned as Magnus spoke, “ _ Alexander…you couldn’t possibly lose that boy. _ ” He reassured with a confidence that left Alec flabbergasted, “How do you know? I told my parabatai I was in love with him…that I wanted to date him  **AND A** _ WARLOCK AT THE SAME TIME!!”  _ Of course Alec didn’t need to relay the play by play to Magnus, he’d been there, he’d helped Alec get to a place of acceptance in regards to his feelings for Jace. He’d been… _ amazing _ . And while open-mindedness had never been a Lightwood trait, Magnus was helping him see how easy life could be with the bending of rules, when he put his own well being and happiness first for  _ once _ . 

           “Can I see you tomorrow?” He asked, and smiled despite his upset when Magnus agreed, “Thank you. Magnus?” His voice lifted in question and Magnus spoke up, “Yes, dear Alexander?” His voice always seemed to be so casual and collected, it threw Alec off for a moment before he heard the knock at his door and moved towards it, phone still in hand. “ **_I love you._ ** ” He spoke pulling the door open and finding Jace standing before him, face somber and shoulder’s hunched. “I have to go…” He spoke quietly before pulling the phone from his ear and setting it down on the nearest surface, his eyes wide as he watched Jace enter his room without invitation.

***

             Jace entered the room, turning to face Alec and nodding as Alec shut the door behind him, “Alec I…” He hesitated, something about being in close quarters with Alec like this had his resolve crumbling much more quickly than he’d planned to and he stepped back, “I wanted to talk to you about..” His shoulders lifted, they both knew what he wanted to talk about, the tension in the room, the wide gap of space between them it was enough to decipher why he was here. Jace paused, hoping Alec would interrupt, say  _ anything _ , unsure of how to continue on and look Alec in the eye while he broke his heart. He couldn’t do that. He didn’t  _ want _ to. Because at the end of the day, his feelings as conflicting as they were, were the same. He  _ loved _ Alec, there wasn’t anything he wouldn’t do for him. And since Alec had confessed, Jace couldn’t stop wondering if his own feelings were more, more than they should have been. He still hadn’t arrived at a conclusion for that yet, but he felt like he was nearing one as he watched Alec’s face. One he knew well, better than his own perhaps. Expressions that were studied and forged into his mind after years of standing side by side and looking into those eyes that always seemed to speak louder than his parabatai’s words. “If we got caught….” His voice wavered, betraying him in his weakest moment and he saw Alec’s eyes flicker and widen. “Tell me you’ve thought this through, Alec?”

*** 

           “We won’t.” Alec interrupted, feeling a dry lump form in his throat, wondering, hoping if this meant…could it be? Did Jace feel the same? How did that happen? And when? Alec found himself more frightened they he had moments earlier when they weren’t speaking, now it was  _ real _ . And Jace wasn’t denying him, he wasn’t leaving. “Are you saying you want this, Jace?” He asked, though after a long pause of heavy silence. He felt his brows furrow, his forehead creasing into wrinkles of thought as he eyed Jace, studying golden eyes before he nodded and watched Jace do the same, feeling a surge of warmth through his body that seemed to originate from the rune that would eternally bond them. He was sure he had t have imagined it before he looked to Jace and watched the blonde press the palm of his hand to the mirroring rune on his side and look back up with wide eyes. “Jace I…” Alec hesitated, he couldn’t say the words yet, not until he knew for sure that they’d be reciprocated. “You don’t have to do this.” He spoke, despite everything in him wanting it,  _ needing it _ . He didn’t want it if it wasn’t what Jace wanted. He didn’t want it just because he could. He  _ loved _ Jace. He  _ loved _ Magnus.  And if they both loved him, he wanted them both to have him.

***

     “Alec…” Jace’s voice was softer now, much softer than he’d used in a long while and he found himself moving, closer, closing distance between them until they were close enough to feel each other’s breath. He felt his heart beating fast, too fast - and he knew he should stop to take a breath but he feared if he did he’d lose his nerve entirely. There was only one way to be sure, it was forbidden. It was  _ wrong _ . But even as he leaned up to meet Alec, in the quiet privacy of his room, behind closed doors, he couldn’t help but feel that it was very right. Like their years of bonding had been leading to this. Jace didn’t stop, he didn’t hesitate and his lips pressed to Alec’s in a confidence that surprised him in this moment. Their kiss slow at first, as though they were testing the waters, awkward and chaste until Jace felt a shift, Alec’s hands moved, one cupping his cheek as their tongues met, drawing a soft moan-like noise from Jace’s throat. “Alec.” Jace whispered between breathless kisses finally willing himself to break away from a kiss that was rapidly changing everything he thought he knew, “Alec…I want to do it.” He nodded, his own hands moving cupping Alec’s face, staring into his eyes and offering an expression of surety. “I want to date you and Magnus. If that’s what you want. If that’s what he wants…”

***

    When Alec had dropped the phone, he hadn’t hung up and before Magnus had he heard the voice in the room.  _ Jace _ . And even though he wasn’t there to witness it he was old enough, wise enough to know what was happening between the parabatai. He let the words that Jace spoke sink in, smiling to himself as he finally gave them the privacy they needed to sort through this new chapter in their relationship. “It’s what I want.” He whispered, setting the phone down and moving across the room to fix himself a celebratory drink. 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> This was a prompt requested by a friend of mine on tumblr, that said it will serve as a prequel to a Malace series I'm currently working on.


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